|
About
happycreature[at]gmail[dot[com]
[ BLAMBLOG ]
Ed Locke's Grandpa
Happy Creature
Ms. Johnson
PIX
[ PILOTS! ]
Bill Doskoch
72hrchik
BlogTO
Clusterfuck Nation
Dead Robot
democraticSPACE
Enter the Chapel
estrojenn
Finn's Space
Fred the Blog
John Gushue
Patrick Byck
Rick Mercer
Rocketboom
Simple Splendor
Squiddity
Confessions of a Monkey
[ A-TEAM ]
AllThingsChristie & BWE
Circadian Shift
Daily Dose
Davezilla
Dooce
Jett Superior
Kitty Bukkake
Sugarmama
Tony Pierce
[ TORONTO ROCKS ]
Accordion Guy
Alan Hunt
Andrew Spicer
Angie McKaig
armchair garbageman
Bacon and Eh's
Bored Astronaut
Cellar Dweller
Chip Tijuana
Chromewaves
Clara*
Consolation Champs
Biker Chick
Dave Howard
Day in the Life
Digifox
Easternblog
freckle stof
Help!
Ice Queen
indigoblog
JBWarehouse
Liz Vang
Luminescent
Lunerose
Maria
Marmalade
moot point
Nug
Photojunkie
Pony
Pshaw
Radio Weisblogg
Raymi
Riri's Braindump
RobotJohnny
Rusty Robot
Sally McKay
Sarah Pengelly
Secret Storm
ShanghaiM
Ultrablog
United Bingdom
wainbows
Warren Kinsella
Zoilus
[ ALL IN THE FAMILY ]
Merv!
Dad!
Gillian
Kevin!
[ ORGANIZIZED ]
GTA Bloggers
TorontoComic Jam
[ BEACHCOMBERS ]
Good, Matthew
Good, Jennifer
Ian King
Jeff Merritt
[ GOTHAM CITY ]
Explananda
Lindsayism
My Blog is Poop
Yoon!
[ ST. ELSEWHERE ]
Blogebrity
blogumentary
Brett Lamb: Oz
Bunny McIntosh
Dust My Broom
elanamatic
Go Fug Yourself
Grrrl Meets World
James Bow
Little Lioness
SKSmith
Shelly
Skillzy
Tom Tomorrow
[ 6 O'CLOCK NEWS ]
boing boing
Cursor
Drawn!
Fark
Garlicster
Metafilter
Plastic
The Register
SciFi Daily
Sexblogs
Slashdot
Space.com
The Smoking Gun
Zeropaid
[ CARTOONS ]
Corrigan
Children
of the Atom
Fiona Smyth
Maakies
MacKay
MNFTIU.cc
Secret Lair
Smell of Steve
[ VARIETY HOUR ]
B3TA
Hoogerbrugge
Milk & Cookies
Mumbleboy
Onion
Rathergood
XE
[ RERUNS ]
[ 2005 ]
JANUARY
FEBRUARY
MARCH
APRIL
MAY
JUNE
JULY
AUGUST
[ 2004 ]
MAY
JUNE
JULY
AUGUST
SEPTEMBER
OCTOBER
NOVEMBER
DECEMBER
[ 2002 ]
[ 2003 ]
|
Wednesday, August 31, 2005
Tales from the Condom Tree
Queen & Spadina
The Monthly Toronto Comic Jam @ The Cameron House
 The remnants of hurricane Katrina were passing over the city and I was at the Jam drawing a duck when Dave Lapp and Nadia peeked over my shoulder [Nadia's post is here featuring my hand gestures].
NADIA: Is that guy talking to a duck?
BLAMB: Yeah! A guy talking to a duck, whoever heard of such a thing? Funny, eh?
DL: I guess ...
BLAMB: Come on! Ducks are funny! Daffy Duck, Donald Duck, Howard the Duck, Duck & Cover ...
NADIA: It depends on how the duck is presented. Ducks Unlimited isn't funny. You can't just rely on ducks to get cheap laughs.
 DL: If you want a cheap laugh, you know what works?
BLAMB: Swiss cheese?
DL: CONDOMS!
BLAMB: Hmmmm, you might be right. Didn't you guys find some Condom Tree somewhere?
NADIA: In Queen's Park.
DL: It's weird, some trees have one or two condoms beneath them but there's this one tree where there are a bunch of condoms. I counted fifteen once.
 BLAMB: Gee, what's the attraction?
DL: I dunno. It's a really big tree.
BLAMB: Maybe there are little condom elves living in it.
NADIA: Making their cookies and their condoms.
DL: The night we visited, we sat on a bench and watched for a while to see if anything would happen ... but we didn't see anything. No elves, trolls or other woodland creatures ... not even a racoon.
BLAMB: I want to go and seek out the Condom Tree now! It sounds like this year's secret swing! But with condoms.
Just then, JamMaster Dave Howard joined us.
DH: You guys are still on about the Condom Tree?
BLAMB: It sounds like such a magical place. What exactly happens under a Condom Tree?
 
DH: Well, first you do the this ...
NADIA: And you put the thingy in the area ...
DL: And you maneuver your arrangement into the location ...
 BLAMB: I don't see it.
D: It's positioning.
DH: It's timing.
NADIA: It's so simple, why do we even need to explain it to you?
BLAMB: So, it's like sex?
DL: What did you think they were doing with the condoms?
BLAMB: I dunno ... elf stuff.
DL: Some of the ones we found were filled with ... er, custard.
ALL: EWWWW ...
DH: This is the one case where 'jizzz' is a a less obscene word than 'custard' ...
BLAMB: But elves MAKE CUSTARD!
12:53 AM
, # ,
|
|
|
