In the weeks leading up to Hot Docs there's so much work, it puts a dent in the routines of several dogs. To make up for that, Jenn creates a batch of special, homemade dog cookies every year that make the dogs go wild.
Above you can see Lexie demonstrate her patented lunge-for-the-cookie-and-chomp. Again.
Walking home through the alley this evening, I saw an odd animal I've never seen in the city before: POSSUM! The only time I've ever seen possum are as roadkill in Michigan.
Opossum numbers are increasing in Ontario as a result of a lack of natural predators and warmer winters in recent years. If you see an Opossum in your area, consider yourself lucky that you have just seen North America 's only marsupial (the females carry their babies in a pouch)! .... When they feel threatened, Opossums try to appear intimidating, but their behaviour is largely for show. They will stand still and open their mouth wide, showing you their many teeth in hopes you will run away; if this doesn't work, they will try to turn and get away; if the Opossum feels it has no chance for escape, its last line of defense is to go into a coma-like state, drooling and emitting a foul odour in hopes of convincing the predator that it is dead, and therefore unattractive prey.
For the record -- again -- I am not Brad J. Lamb. I am clearly C. J. Horace Lambthwistle XVIII.
Owen Pallett, the composer of the song (listen to it here, it's quite good) isn't the only only who has it in for Lamb; turns out Tony also wants everyone to boycott the guy. Oh, wait, that post is four years old ... DAMN! I MISSED THE BOYCOTT!
Previously: 1 - They Meet 2 - Orders Belinda Stronach the Giraffe convinced Peter MacKay the Polar Bear to cross the tundra to meet Stephen Harper the Elephant ...
STRONACH: Okay, buddy. I brought him ... go easy on him. He's just a boy.
HARPER: Whoa ... Who's a boy? Who are you? Who am I? What is I? Did you know that 'i' is the only letter in I?
STRONACH: Oh crap, he's on another 'soul journey'.
HARPER: I can see the aura of your soul crackling like lightning across the surface of your body. I can see the colour of your smell.
STRONACH: ... great.
HARPER: I can hear the future. I can taste the past.
MACKAY: He's sounds different ...
HARPER: Peter? Is that you?
STRONACH: It's him, Stephen.
HARPER: Why are you so afraid, Peter?
MACKAY: The world is getting warmer and I ain't got no fish!
HARPER: No, man. The world isn't getting warmer, it's staying the same while the universe grows colder.
MACKAY: Huh?
HARPER: It's all part of the great, intelligent design.
STRONACH: Peter is thinking about joining us.
HARPER: Peter already joined us. He's always joined us, he always will. He just hasn't embraced the union, man.
MACKAY: Wow, he's so deep.
HARPER: I'm so thin I'm transparent, I have no mass, I am energy shaped and crafted by the Creator.
STRONACH: You're stoned.
MACKAY: Something has really changed, this is not the man I hated.
Beyond Beats - Sat Apr 29, Sat May 6 Shadow Company - Mon May 1, Fri May 5
There's a very strong selection of films at theis year's Hot Docs and here are two worth checking out, Beyond Beats: A Hip-Hop Head Weighs in on Manhood in Hip-Hop Culture and Shadow Company. Both docs offer a complete examination of their subjects and you'll leave the theatre feeling like you've had the full course.
Beyond Beats Not only does Byron Hurt's doc critically consider every -- EVERY -- aspect of hip-hop culture, it's full of revealing moments when the people on camera unwittingly expose themselves or help Hurt make his case. In one scene, when asked why he doesn't rap about positive things, a young rapper immediately unleashes some uplifting, positive poetry and then gives the camera a withering look and asks 'who the hell is going to buy that'. Hurt manages to take all the loose threads and make the connections between the negative stereotypes and the money and power.
Beyond Beats also screens with Heavy Metal Jr., which is just like Metallica: Some Kind of Monster except with pre-teens. A group of rocker kids prepare for the big concert and it doesn't seem like they're going to make it. Features my favourite pain-inducing scene of any of the docs I've screened so far this year.
Shadow Company Mixes humour and horror as it examines the role of the mercenary in contemporary armed conflicts. Even though the screening note refers to Iraq, this is not another 'Iraq film'; it looks at several conflicts where mercenaries or private security firms played different roles with different results. Again, you'll leave the theatre feeling like you got the whole story.
Speaking of Iraq docs, there is one in the fest, White Platoon Baghdad 2004, and it's quite good but it seems like once you've seen one embedded-with-soldiers-in-Iraq doc, you've seen them all. The subtle shift in this one compared to earlier Iraq conflict docs is the obvious growing frustration and boredom of the soldiers who just wish that someone would shoot at them to relieve the monotony.
Peter Cetera once sang about the glory of love for the soundtrack of a Karate Kid sequel. If he were alive today, he'd sing about the glory of enjoying a sandwich with a strong shot of prune juice. Prune juice is glorious, it's like drinking the blood of god.
The other night I watched the mockumentary, Blackballed: The Bobby Dukes Story, [ trailer here ] which opens for a week-long run at the Royal Cinema this Friday (and Vancouver, Winnipeg & Edmonton in May) and it's damn funny. It stars Rob Corddry from the Daily Show. Check it out, it's a lot of fun ... like Saving Private Ryan, but with paint:
In the heat of the 1993 Hudson Valley Classic, Paintball's greatest legend, Bobby Dukes, gets caught wiping (cheating) and is banned from the sport. Humiliated and disgraced, Bobby Dukes disappears.
Ten years have passed and an older, wiser Bobby returns to compete in the tournament from which he was banished ...
There's a great supporting cast of wacky characters including a Canadian paintball team who are the world's biggest jerks. Worth seeing!
Hot Docs starts two weeks from tomorrow. This year's Programme Guide just came back from the printer and you can get a copy for $2 cheap at the Fest Box Office at Sonic Boom Records on Bloor. It's 160 pages of documentary film action and you can see how I used Rannie's photography.
Also, Images Festival kicks off tonight with their gala and opening night party.
Last night I dreamt that I had to go play the violin at a recital even though I don't know how to play the violin. But even the closer to performance time, the less I seemed to care. I mucked around with the instrument a bit and it was clear in my mind that I was as capable of operating a violin as I am able to pilot the space shuttle.
Wasn't that last post a great, rockin' return to the bloggin'? You wouldn't think that anyone could do a worse rendition of 'We Didn't Start the Fire', but there it is. I love the little rock sub-genres like Christian rock that slather a drippy layer of ideology over their music; it puts the musicians in a very submissive position instead of being provocative, which is what you expect from "rock". Watch that video and then listen to Andy Williams pwn MacArthur Park for a good comparison.
I've seen two -- TWO! -- rats in the past five days. Rats. [ shiver ] I hate rats. That's the problem with a mild winter, you end up with a vermin festival the following spring. You know what's next ...
Did you see that new condo planned for Mississauga? Someone should slap the next person who calls it 'Marilyn Monroe'. I hate it when news people try to force a nickname, like CNN did with that 'Chemical Ali' guy.
Democracy is on the way, hitting like a tidal wave All over the middle east, dictators walk with shaky knees Don't know what they're gonna do, their worst nightmare is coming true They fear the domino effect, they’re all wondering who's next
Domino effect? Funny they should mention Vietnam ...
HARPER: I can see the aura of your soul crackling like lightning across the surface of your body. I can see the colour of your smell.
HARPER: Peter already joined us. He's always joined us, he always will. He just hasn't embraced the union, man.
The other night I watched the mockumentary, 
