Canadian History Moment (originally posted July 3, 2006)

On this Canada Day weekend, in light of the CBC pulling a docu-drama about Tommy Douglas because of historical inaccuracies, we present this factually-correct story:

The True Tommy Douglas Story, 1962
As relayed by Woodrow Llyod

Even though I'd taken over from Douglas as premiere of Saskatchewan, on that cold winter night I knew I needed Tommy. I needed his his magic. It was a bad one, the worst yet.



LLOYD: They came back! They thought that because you were gone, it was safe.

DOUGLAS: It's good that you brought me.

LLOYD: We should call the mounties, too.

DOUGLAS: NO. I will face them. You stay here.



Douglas set out and walked towards the glowing hanger. Mad laughter and other sounds echoed from the place. He got closer. And closer.



Figures darted around Douglas in the night. He fought them. He struggled forward, towards the hangar. And vanished inside. Howls and screams rang out. I wanted to run, I wanted to rush to help Tommy. But I just stood in my place, frozen with fear.

I waited for hours. I didn't know what to do. I must have nodded off at one point because when I awoke, Tommy was standing over me.



LLOYD: Tommy?

TOMMY: Yes.

He was exhausted. His face weary. He looked as though he bore the burden of a thousand centuries.

TOMMY: That's the thing I hate about Saskatchewan ....

LLOYD: What, Tommy?

TOMMY: All the damn vampires.



Other moments in Canadian history:

Mutant Bear Attack in Upper Canada, 1852

Emily Carr vs. The Group of 7 Mutoid Dwarfs

The Biomechanical Insectoid Dionne Quintuplets

Trudeau's Long Walk in the Snow, 1984

Hit Song in Winnipeg 1991

10:13 AM , # , |

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